braxton michael | nine months.

We're celebrating the past nine months today, because that's exactly how long you've been in our arms! Seriously, little one, watching you grow + learn new tricks is SO. MUCH. FUN. You are a professional crawler these days - your favorite thing to do is follow me around the house, and the cackle you let out when I jump out from around a wall and yell, "BOO!" is the best. I can only handle a few of those laughs, because it nearly kills me to keep playing and not scoop you up and kiss you all over. If I had to pick two words to describe you, I wouldn't hesitate at all: cuteness. overload. That's you, buddy! You've started to pull up on some things (mainly if you like what's above you - mommy's phone, for example), but you are mostly content to go back and forth between crawling from one place to another, sitting up and playing with whatever you stumble upon. You still really love your mama (that's me! hehe), and you usually end up crawling into my lap every few minutes while we're playing. Where mama is, that's where you want to be, and if you are being held by or playing with someone else, you look around to see where I am every few seconds juuuuuuust to make sure I'm still there. There are no words to adequately describe how that makes me feel, but it's pretty much like fireworks constantly going off in my heart. You make me swoon, little B!

You've had lots of adventures this month (surprise, surprise) including camping, hiking, walks + runs around our neighborhood (with our new-to-us jogger stroller thanks to Pop and Gigi), hanging out with your beloved family members who are always so willing + eager to spend time with you, and you even took your first trip to Florida this past weekend! Big timin' is what you are, and I follow you closely to make sure that it's all documented + celebrated. You've been extra mischievous this past month, too. Yes, it's still cute, but I'm telling you...sometimes it makes your mama crazy. Seeing-cross-eyed, head-spinning crazy. Becoming your mommy has stretched me, revealed idols that I never knew I had, increased the desire in me to love without restraint, but most of all it has given me countless opportunities to grow in patience + steadfastness. I want to be the best mommy I can be, and I realize more each day that my desire must be rooted in a longing to glorify God more than myself AND a desire to serve your daddy over myself in order for that to happen. As you grow, daddy + I grow, too! And speaking of growth, your first tooth has finally come out, and a second one is allllllmost popping through. HOORAY! You're a little snaggle-toothed thing right now, because your top tooth to the left of your middle top teeth (did you follow that?) was the first one to pop out. I've never heard of any baby who has had that tooth come in first before now, which makes you extra special. You've been quite pitiful since this season of teething *officially* began a few weeks ago, but it hasn't killed either of us yet (hallelujah!). As exciting as it is that you're no longer toothless, your gums have been acting as teeth for some time now. You have no problem crunching up whatever is in your mouth and asking (mmmm-ing) for more within seconds. Daddy and Auntie Mel are always on-edge when you eat food that isn't pureed, but you just keep on eating and encouraging them to get over their fears of you choking. It's pretty entertaining to watch them, and I'm convinced that getting a reaction out of them is a big motivator for you coughing while you eat. A little while ago, you went through a phase of preferring fruit over your vegetables. Most people told me to mix in a little fruit with your vegetables so that you were still getting your nutrients without knowing you were eating them, but I was pretty unsettled by this approach. Different things work for different families, but I chose to stick it out and continue giving you what didn't necessarily want while praying before, through, and after every stubborn scream. You don't know this yet, little one, but you are currently being raised in a culture where "do what makes you feel good" is the theme. It may sound silly, but I am convinced that in order to overcome this new trend we must be disciplined in even the foods that we feed you, because you're already learning what you like and don't like. The last thing I want to do for you is sugar-coat everything in your life so that you never cry - honestly, I'm not scared to make you cry, as long as it's something that will produce good, because I want you to know that sometimes the things we want least are the very things that we need most. My prayer is that you learn to love what must be done, not avoid it altogether until getting back to the place you need to be seems like an impossible feat. As much as I want you to grow big and strong physically, your emotional and spiritual growth is just as important to your daddy + me.

You're still sleeping all night, napping great (most days), nursing four times a day, and eating three meals + several snacks throughout each day. I often think back on how much God blew the minds of everyone in the hospital (mine included) when He enabled us to nurse after all the "trauma" (as they called it) my body experienced, and because of that, feeding you is so much more than just feeding you. You and I are both miracles, and the special bond we get to share because of God's grace on us is a miracle, too. We go to the doctor for our wellness check this morning, and I can't wait to see how you've grown over the past three months. You are wearing twelve-month clothes (mainly because of your length), but you can still fit into a few of your nine-month onesies. I may or may not have shed a few tears when I put those twelve-month pajamas on you for the first time - it's crazy how equally exciting and bittersweet it is to watch you grow up. I remind myself all the time that I'm not just watching a little boy grow - no, your daddy + I been entrusted with the very important job of raising a man. Every habit we create with you, every decision we make with each new season is so much more than just a moment in time. All of these moments may seem little and insignificant, but they're not because they add up to your life - a very important thing, might I add. We love you so unbelievably much, Baby B, and we are continually in awe that you are ours!

sc strong.

A lot of different people from a lot of different places have a lot of different opinions about my state. Some are good, some are not-so good, and some are simply indifferent towards us at all while claiming the "who cares" stance. A few months ago, in the wake of many changes across our country, I read many articles and Facebook statuses commenting on how happy the writers were to be "out of the south" because our lack of progression was "disgusting," "embarrassing," and "juvenile." I don't know much about how we rank in comparison to other states in a lot of things, but I'm aware of some of the ridicule we receive based on many of our values and beliefs. I've heard people and read stories that call us "rednecks," "fools," "country bumpkins," and "gun-toting morons" who "need to get with the times," and the range of emotions that come as a result of those statements aren't always neat and tidy. Sometimes I read something that literally makes me feel like I've got a fire burning in my stomach, and other times tears fill my eyes as I wonder how such cruel words could be spoken. I realize that my opinions don't match everyone else's opinions, and I am also aware that many of my opinions get brushed off as unimportant and irrelevant. That doesn't, however, stop me from having them, just as it doesn't stop anyone else from having theirs.

In the wake of tragedy, both preventable and unpreventable by man, southerners have once again revealed our lack of progression. We have not progressed past forgiveness in the midst of suffering. We have not progressed beyond caring for those who are in need, whether they be loved ones or total strangers. We have not progressed to the point of simply saying "You are in our thoughts and prayers" and going about our lives as if nothing happened, but have put our money where our mouth is, so to speak. We have backed up those thoughts and prayers with action, service, and sacrifice. Others who have been moved to compassion across the country have joined us in our efforts to restore what has been lost as well, and gratitude has been expressed by the recipients of that generosity. I recently read a post that beautifully explained the response of our state in this present trial: "The problem in SC is that our needs are changing by the minute because as soon as one is identified, it is met beyond measure. The problem in SC is that our generosity outweighs the greatest natural disaster our state has seen in quite a long time...perhaps ever." Yes, the flood waters are still receding. Yes, homes have been destroyed all over the Palmetto State, especially in the lower parts. Yes, it is going to take a long time to get things back to "normal." Yes, we are mourning over those whose lives ended in the wake of this tragedy. But are we without hope? Are we alone in our heartache and struggles? The answer is a resounding no to both of those questions.

People can say what they want about South Carolina, and I'm certain that they still will even after all of this, but I am proud to say this is where I was born and raised. I'm proud that when darkness tries to shake us and break us, the only thing it succeeds in is helping us shine brighter than before. Sure, the terrors may rattle us and cause us to cry out in fear and sorrow over the present situation, but our foundation is strong. We hold fast to hope, clinging to truth: that our weakness is simply an opportunity for the One who sustains us to be strength for us (2 Corinthians 12). You can't fake heart, you can't force people to care, and you can't make people love one another in purity. That's why I love my state. Instead of letting someone else deal with the mess, our state is being and sending missionaries to help those in need, and instead of trying to understand why this happened or what the future may hold, the people are doing what needs to be done moment by moment, and trusting that every need will be met. This disaster has created opportunities for growth that won't be recorded as progression, even though that's exactly what it is. Political progression is what the media habitually comments on and refers to, but the kind of progression that we are witnessing in the south is growth in humility, love, service, obedience, trust, and compassion. My unwavering opinion is that this is the kind of progression that matters most, and yet we are often chastised for having not "progressed" as quickly as the rest of our society has. We are commonly referred to as a stumbling block to moving forward as a country, and while I quickly admit and wholeheartedly agree that the south has not always gotten everything right, I have seen us rally around and support each other in ways that few others do. South Carolina may be just another state on a map to you, but to me it's a place where community means locking arms with each other, where even strangers are considered family, and where generosity doesn't just mean those who give the most money.

In the face of adversity and strife, South Carolina remains faithful and strong, secured by the roots of indivisibility that were planted so long ago. When one of us hurt we all hurt, and that's what love for and commitment to each other looks like. I pray that we never get so caught up in the never-ending game of getting ahead that we forget (or worse, choose not) to lend a helping hand to those in need, because only one of these matters in light of eternity. The first is rooted in a love for self, while the latter is rooted in a love for others.

South Carolina, God is being glorified in our efforts, and the whole world is seeing glimpses of His love. He is what makes us strong, our very present Help in time of need, and the Lamp that lights our way. Let's all shout with one voice, "Hallelujah!" to our great Promise Maker and Promise Keeper as we continue to wade through the waters, and let's not delay in helping in whatever way we are able - especially through our prayers.

"When you realize He sacrificed to give us life, you will start to say, "How can I sacrifice to give other people life?"

Tim Keller

glassy mountain | our first HiB adventure.

It's no surprise to most people I know that one of my favorite things to do is hike. Blazing through different trails is something I have found to be a great way to disconnect with the world around me (i.e. all the distractions) while reconnecting with what really matters, such as fresh air and people who mean a lot to me. TJ and I began hiking together just before our first anniversary, and it quickly became a beloved tradition that is still going strong. Braxton loves bumping along in his carrier on one of our backs, too, and he usually talks a good bit + takes in all the things around him as we trek towards our destination. A few months after B was born, a friend of mine introduced me to a group of fellow hiking-obsessed folks known as Hike it Baby, and Greenville even has its own branch (heck yes!). I've been wanting to go on a hike with this group for a while, but it just hadn't worked out yet for numerous reason - until yesterday, that is. The clouds parted + the sun came out yesterday for the first time in a week, our Tuesday morning + afternoon was completely open, and it was the perfect opportunity to celebrate the end of cabin fever at the bungalow with some time in my happy place.

B, myself, and five other mamas + their babes met at the Glassy Mountain trailhead in Flat Rock, NC to begin the hike, and we ended right back where we started from a little over three miles later. I'd never met any of these ladies before, but our shared passion for the great outdoors + our little boys made for a quick transition from strangers to friends. I can assure you that this won't be the last time that Braxton + I explore alongside of fellow Hike it Baby-ers! This was our first adventure on the trails without Da-da, which was a little sad, but he was excited to hear all about the fun we had + see all the pictures I took when he got home.

The trees were just beginning to change colors, I was grinning from ear to ear as I drove through the curvy mountain roads, my prayers were simply "Thank you, Jesus" the whole time we trekked, and being in the presence of other mamas who enjoy the same hobby as me was a big reason for those prayers that I was praying. I'll be honest - it stung a little bit to pass by Skytop Orchard not once but TWICE without stopping, buuuuuut I couldn't do that to Teesh. Let's just say I hope I get to go back to this beautiful place soon!

So, without further ado, here are the scenes from that time that a handful of moms ruled the trail.

camping extravaganza | last few favorites.

This time last week, we were gearing up for our first overnight stay in the great outdoors with a new babe + precious friends. Isn't it funny how you plan for + anticipate something happening for months and then all of a sudden it's over? Memories like this past weekend are extra sweet with a small dose of bitter because although they're always fun, they always pass so fast. We took advantage of every moment, even especially the lazy ones, ate too many s'mores, braved the shallow water while our feet stood in the mush below, and dreamed of where our next tent camping adventure would be, and watched our boys play together in disbelief over how big they've gotten. Camping with kids is a lot different than it was without them, but it's the best kind of different. The very, very best.

camping extravaganza | our x-men.

Who is the little buddy I referred to in yesterday's post? Well, it was our fellow X-Man, Maddox, of course! Our beloved Haltiwangers joined us on our weekend camping extravaganza, and we had the best time. Seriously...THE. BEST. TIME. Both of these handsome babes had their first camping experience, and there was lots of baby chasing (AKA Maddox chasing), lots of food + snacking, lots of still frames captured, lots of dreaming of what our next adventure together will be, reminiscing on how good God has been to us in giving us our precious sons, lots of applauding Russell for being a professional fire starter, and even some stories of life before marriage (a major source of laughter, might I add). One of the best parts, however, was watching our two little ones play with each other. Oh my, how cute they were! They shared their toys, shared their parents, paraded around with no clothes on, and even gave each other hugs + kisses (so. stinking. cute). I have been praying for both of these kiddos since before they were even conceived, so it pretty much makes fireworks explode inside of my soul to see them growing up together. They are such a beautiful testimony of the Lord's perfect will, and though I still pray fervently for them, I also pray for their parents just as much. We are certainly blessed to have birthed babies, but now it is our responsibility to help them grow into men - a responsibility that ought not be taken either too lightly or too seriously. I pray we never forget that they are not the only ones who are growing, and that they would both learn about Jesus by watching Him at work in their daddies + mommies.

"Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward."

Psalm 127:3

camping extravanza | our first night.

We returned home yesterday after spending a weekend on the outskirts of Clemson at Lake Hartwell. We had anxiously awaited this particular weekend for nearly two months, and we could hardly wait to pitch our tent beside the water. The sun stayed above the trees just long enough for us to get all of our gear set up + organized on that first night, and we managed to not freak out too terribly bad when we realized all the little things we had forgotten at home. B was happy, content, and curious for most of our stay, and he loved spending some uninterrupted time with one of his little buddies (ahh, I get ahead of myself - there will be more to share about that tomorrow). For now, just know that this weekend was wonderful in more ways than can be counted.

This mini-escape, of sorts, came at the perfect time, and aside from all the smiles + laughs we shared together, my favorite thing about our time away was leaning my head back and looking at the millions of stars above me. The sky was perfectly blue during the day + perfectly black at night, and those twinkling lights that made the darkness above us sparkle took my breath away. Looking up reminds me of how small I really am, and my perspective stays in line with Truth. The more I grow in humility, the more I grow in thankfulness. This weekend sang His sweet song over me as we vacationed away from all of our everyday tasks, and I can promise you that there is no sweeter song in the whole world.

When is the last time you looked up?