Monday, February 9, 2015

the best man.

I've known that there was no one else in the whole world like TJ Bargeron for a long time now. He has stood by my side through everything from uncontrollable joy to petty drama to warranted sorrow, and often times, he has helped me stand when I couldn't find the strength to do it on my own. Four weeks ago from this very day, however, he demonstrated his out-of-this-world character in ways that he never had before. It's not every day that a man witnesses his wife's life nearly come to an abrupt end as he stands there helplessly watching it all happen while holding his newborn son in his arms. I can't imagine what he must have felt in that moment and the hours of continued uncertainty that followed, but I will never forget the look of terror that I saw on his face as I searched for him while falling backwards. I hope I never, ever see that look on his face again as long as I live.

Although I was unconscious for the next couple of days, I have heard countless testimonies of what a warrior my husband was during that time. For more than sixty hours, he didn't sleep. Instead, he went back and forth between the nursery to check on + love on Braxton and CCU to check on + be near to me. He was asked questions he never anticipated answering, listened to news of my state go from very bad to questionable to hopeful, made sure that everyone who was waiting with him was constantly updated on both B's and my conditions, helped everyone hold it together as they battled emotions + "what if"s, and that's just the start of it. Though I didn't hear him, I know that he spent most of those sixty hours praying. Begging. Pleading. No one on earth has ever loved me as wholeheartedly + with so much purity + as selflessly as this man has, and I am confident in my conviction that as hard as the thousands of people who were lifting me up to the Father were praying, he was praying harder than all of them combined. My Teesh is a careful steward of even the seemingly mundane events + responsibilities of life, and this particular situation has given our families + friends + all those who witnessed him in action an even more profound sense of respect + gratitude for him.

There isn't a better man on the planet, and I have praised Jesus for him more during this past month than I have in the eleven years I've been blessed to call him mine. His vow of "for better or for worse" has been demonstrated in ways neither of us ever thought they ever would be, and he has not even once ceased to drop everything he is doing + come running as soon as I need his help. As wonderful of a boyfriend + fancy + husband he has been to me, I have no doubt that he will always be the best daddy to our beloved Braxton. I have already begun to tell B throughout each day about how blessed we are that he belongs to us, and I intend to keep telling him that for the rest of his life. One day, he won't need me to tell him because he will realize it for himself.

By the looks of it, he already has.

"Above all, maintain an intense love for each other, since love covers a multitude of sins. Be hospitable to one another without complaining. Based on the gift each one has received, use it to serve others, as good managers of the varied grace of God. If anyone speaks, it should be as one who speaks God's words; if anyone serves, it should be from the strength God provides, so that God may be glorified through Jesus Christ in everything. To Him belong the glory and the power forever and ever. Amen."
-1 Peter 4:8-11

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